sblack: Neil Young sings the Fresh Prince theme.
25 good reasons to dress up.
quitecheeky: Because life’s too short to blend in. Don’t settle for average. Because you’re only young once. You’re way more gorgeous than you know & have a fabulous body you’ll one day look back on and wish you had! Take advantage now and show off how fabulous you can be. Because fashion is a method of self expression. What are you trying to say? Because you never know who...
I know you said it would take three weeks but I’ve just looked at my budget and...– (via clientsfromhell)
How to cook a turkey
julie911: Go buy a turkey Take a drink of whiskey Put turkey in the oven Take another 2 drinks of whiskey Set the degree at 375 ovens Take 3 more whiskeys of drink Turn oven the on Take 4 whisks of drinky Turk the bastey Whiskey another bottle of get Stick a turkey in the thermometer Glass yourself a pour of whiskey Bake the whiskey for 4 hours Take the oven out of the turkey Take...
Window replacement at LAMP high school. Thank you. First new windows since 1923.
May your stuffing be tasty, May your turkey be plump, May your potatoes and...
Prospective client: $400 for a logo?! Why are you so expensive? My nephew has Photoshop—I can just get him to do it.
Me: Does your nephew have Microsoft Word?
Prospective client: Yes.
Me: Then have him write you a novel while he’s at it.
Being crazy isn’t enough.– Dr. Seuss (via kari-shma) (via quote-book)
baking, baking, baking the house smells so good
People aren’t either wicked or noble. They’re like chef’s salads, with good...– Lemony Snicket (The Grim Grotto) (via quote-book)